Full Body Bib

A friend of mine made me full body bib for my kiddo. I just started feeding her and letting her play with food. Sadly the bib was a little small, length & leg hole wise, but still usable. Even not fitting it was great for keeping food off my kiddo's clothes. I decided to make a couple more sized for my little one. This is the first one. I still have to put on the velcro for the neck. I put elastic on the legs so the legs will fit different sized babies or a baby like mine who grows super fast instead of using the straight fabric on the one she gave me. I also made this longer in the waist for my long-torsoed child.

Upcycling Unused Men's Underwear into Baby Yoga Pants

I've been kind of depressed lately and I realized that I really need a project to feel happy & fulfilled. But I need my projects to be short and perfectible because I need that instant gratification/feedback of a job finished, but something that I can do over and over and it still be interesting. I found this really cool blog online about turning a t-shirt into baby yoga pants. I got my husband to go through his closet and clean it out and we came up with some cool patterned unused men's underwear. I am super proud of myself. I made these pants during my kiddo's nap. I planning to give these to a friend who has knitted me many fabulous things including baby toys...

I

I'm planning on making a 2nd pair of pants with these for my kiddo to wear... I also contemplating buying some more of these underwear which would be cheaper than buying fabric.

Blueberry Olive Oil Cake

• • 1 cup unbleached all-purpose flour
  • 1/2 cup almond meal
  • 1-1/2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 2 large eggs
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil
  • 1/2 cup whole milk yogurt
  • 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon grated lemon zest & orange or tangerine zest
  • 1-3/4 cups (about 10 ounces)frozen blueberries
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 13-inch rectangular pan w/olive oil. Whisk together the flour, almond meal, baking powder, and salt in a medium bowl.
  2. Combine the eggs and sugar in a large mixing bowl. Beat on medium-high speed until light in color and increased in volume, about 5 minutes. With the mixer on low speed, add the olive oil in a slow, steady stream. Turn the mixer to medium citrus zest on low speed.
  3. With the mixer on low speed, add the flour mixture, 1/2 cup at a time, until just incorporated. Scrape the batter into the prepared pan, put blueberries on top, and bake for 25 minutes.
  4. Bake until the cake is golden and a toothpick inserted in the center of the cake comes out clean.
  Biscuit like texture...
  
  
  
  
  

The wren has been set free...

After a few weeks of not feeding the wren, I was surprised as always how many worms were still alive and thriving though mostly little ones. Knowing that my time is super limited these days by my little one (baby time is amazing 5 hours pass and you wonder where the day went), I've put the wren in the outside compost and will be storing my tumbleweed worm composting bin in the garage until I'm  ready to grow worms again. Maybe as part of my kiddo's science curriculum. This will be the 2nd time I've had to let go of the indoor worm composting for one reason or another.

The garden blog "Red Wiggler Wren" was named after my little worm collective and I haven't been keeping up with it either. My garden is overgrown in the back yard though I am still getting flowers and telling myself I will spend more time back there some day. The some day is getting farther and farther away.

The Red Wiggler Wren is no more and if you believe in the propheticness of names then it was always meant to go this way considering it was all named after a bin of worms who liked to escape and then dry up and die...

But the joy of composting worms is that you just put those dried up husks back into the worm bin to feed the rest of the worms and they all become something new, yet in essence the same...

What I'm reading Kiddo this week...

Ten in the Bed by Penny Dale is definitely not a new take on a familiar favorite. The illustrations are kind of blah and she uses two of the same objects two teddy bears that fall off the bed at separate times. They do have different nicknames. She calls the stuffed animals by pet names like teddy & croc. There is just not much to learn from this book nor is it very engaging beyond the rhyme itself and the cute ending. Ten in the Bed has definitely been done better.

I give this two BLAHS... Will not be in my kid's library.






So far this gets the award for the worst Eric Carle book we've read. As usual, the illustrations are great but the text that goes along with it is really awful. "I am an elephant and I  stomp my foot. Can you do it? I can do it!" Manperson said that he would have preferred something like I am an elephant and I can pick up things with my nose as a more interesting choice which would have made up for the lack of rhyme/rhythm in the text. No I don't think everything should rhyme, but there needs to be some payoff for the adult reading this. Learning wise this is a real disappointment for those familiar with Eric Carle.

This get three Blahs, because we know he could do better or get Bill Martin to do the text.





This weeks reading hasn't all been Blah. Hippos go Beserk is a fabulous book. It is counting book, not only does it have counting but addition and subtraction. It starts and ends with 1 hippo all alone, but in the middle 44 come and go in all sorts of different ways. Illustrations and texts not only rhyme but are interesting for the adult too. This would also make a great math lesson. Must have for any children's library. I'm definitely planning on getting Kiddo a personal copy.

This gets a big, fat LOVE IT!

Mei Tai Baby Carrier

I made this Mei Tai a few months before my baby was even born. I'd never made one before and I had never seen one in person. I attended a meeting of the Austin Babywearer group that meets monthly at Cherrywood Coffee House a few weeks after Kiddo came into the the world and realized my Mei Tai was not proportioned well for my baby. I used the dimensions on a website pattern that no longer exists. I put a pocket that obviously doesn't work since the tie ends up in the middle of it. It seems too wide for Kiddo's body and the straps that hold her on are too close together so she can't move her head around much.

This morning I cut it up and repositioned the straps, redid the body, and put on different more comfortable straps for my waist. I kept most of the fabric and only added some more blue straps. She can now move her head and I made it so she can have more support on her bottom. 

Sadly, she still hates it. Manperson says it is because the Baby K'tan that she is used to is alot more flexible.  Both fabricwise and how it can be worn. This is supportive, but in being very supportive it is also restrictive of movement. Kiddo does not like to have her movement restricted. She also does not like to have her legs in this position. Back to the drawing board. I have fabric to make Manperson a baby carrier, but until I can manage one that works better I don't want to experiment on the fabric. I'm thinking I need to make the body of this even more narrow to take into account that Kiddo likes her legs to hang straight down which is the way they end up in the baby k-tan. The length of the straps work, but Kiddo also like lots of upper body freedom, so it needs to navigate that fine line between supporting her upper back and letting her support herself.

A Book that Boggles the Mind

I checked out this book from the library and it is a must see board book. The colors  are great for little baby eyes, but I just don't know what to think of it. The only text is the sounds the different characters make, but what really makes this book is that the illustrations are pretty simple and there is this cut-out on every other page that turns one illustration into another. A sheep suddenly becomes a pig from one page to the next. You just have to see it.  I can't decide if this is genius or just confusing.  I definitely want to introduce this book to Kiddo once she can talk and then again when she can read, so I can get a sense of what a child thinks of a book like this.  Not that that will necessarily tell me what it may be doing to my kiddo's brain at 2 and half months. This could also be great for the budding artist, so maybe I could also introduce it again when she starts drawing and see what she thinks of it then.

I guess that means I want this for our home children's library, even though I'm not even sure if I like it. It is just so interesting...

Two More Bill Martin Books

So this book is part of a theme of books by Bill Martin, illustrated by Eric Carle. Baby Bear Baby Bear covers action words like climbing and flying and such. It has Prairie Dogs, Flying Squirrels and Skunks. Great for learning to read, but I think a little too advanced for babies unlike Brown Bear, Brown Bear from my last post, but I still read it to my little one. It is just not one I would get for until she is older and closer to the reading stage.












Polar Bear, Polar Bear covers hearing words like whistling, snarling, bellowing. I'm not too fond of it because though it has the usual illustrations, more unusual animals, and a nice ending, I can just imagine Kiddo one day asking me to mimic the "yelping" of a Peacock and as I read this book to her I really wanted to yelp like a peacock. I just don't remember hearing any peacocks "yelp" and have no idea how to mimic that sound. Though, I guess I could head back to Mayfield park which is the best place in Austin for a peacock encounter. I guess if I want authenticity I could play the sounds from this animal info site  from Seaworld or Animal Picture's Archive in which the peacock sounds more like it is trumpeting. I couldn't find a site that had all of the animal sounds from this book that actually worked. What does the fluting of a flamingo sound like? Do Flamingo's really flute?  And why do I like Brown Bear, Brown Bear even though it is doubtful I will see animals in the colors it names? Maybe because the time at which I read Brown Bear, Brown Bear for my baby I don't really care too much about authenticity, but once we start getting into the big words and reading time, I want books that are more reflective of reality if they have real things in them... Okay and for vanity's sake, I want to be able to mimic sounds for my Kiddo.


My husband after seeing a few of the books in this series would like to read "Sewer Rat, Sewer Rat, What do you Taste?" I kinda would too.

Play Mat

I just finished sewing this playmat for Kiddo. I wanted it for tummy time and I wanted something that was high contrast for her eyes. I've read that babies see black, white, red, and yellow best. I know Kiddo tends to focus on black and white objects much more often when they appear in her visual field.  I've never quilted before or done anything this elaborate. I made lots of mistakes and learned a lot. I figured Kiddo won't mind the mistakes and eventually this will have poop, spitup and pee on it so I shouldn't worry about it too much. I'm planning on attaching some toys around the edges via the elastic rings I sewed on. Though, you can't tell in this image one of the bits of something I used bled. I'm thinking it was the elastic I used. I just didn't think one needed to prewash elastic...

That Good Mom Feeling...

My little one loves the books. I don't know if it is because we are big reading family or because we have a makeshift diaper changing station by one of our bookshelves so that is one of the interesting things she sees. I take her to storytime at the library once a week where she is riveted for a good 30 minutes as the children's librarian reads at least 3 to 4 books with nursery rhyme singing in between. "I kissed the baby" is one of the books read at this past weeks story-time. Even a couple of other mothers have commented on how my kiddo is really into storytime. This wouldn't be half so amazing if she wasn't only 2.5 months old. I started suspecting she was crying because she was bored when she was about 7 weeks old, but in my zombiefied state from extreme sleep deprivation I was not sure if I was reading the signs right. I was already doing things like showing her around the house especially the art work on the walls, making sure she hung out in other rooms besides the living room, showing her black and white flashcards my husband and I made to distract her, rolling her around on a blanket for naked tummy time, and various other things, alot of which I read off of one of my friend's blogs (her baby was born 3 days after mine).

I took kiddo to a momma and baby yoga class on Free Day of Yoga at Austin Kula Yoga. She seemed to really like it and it made me feel like a good mom while meeting some of my needs to be out of the house and get some exercise. Sadly, since I work in the mornings. I won't be going back to that particular yoga class which was the best of the ones of taken since that point in time. I just wish they had a 2pm class. There I saw info on a free demo for Heartsong Music Together. They had one at bookpeople. I had never seen my baby so awake and absorbed, not even at the yoga class. I went to several more demos and each time she seemed to really be into it. Momma/Baby yoga is hit or miss. She seems to like it only every other week or maybe that is because we've tried a new teacher every other week at Yoga Yoga which offers noon classes. I'm not as fond of the YogaYoga ones 'cause some teachers are into Kundalini yoga which I'm not all that fond of though the chanting is fun. Sadly Heartsong Music Together is super expensive, though even then I considered it, they just didn't have a good time available for me to take her. I started looking around for other things and discovered free story-time at the Austin Public Library. I've so far been to two libraries for books and babies. One wasn't so great since the librarian only read one book and the other one gave me that good mom feeling. I'm still really surprised my kiddo can pay attention that long and that so far she hasn't gotten fussy during story-time, though as soon as the last song is sung she is ready for food and a nap.

I'm still on the look-out for other things that give me that good mom feeling. I'm glad that books is one of those things since I've had a lifelong love of them. I will be posting the ones I like here.

"I Kissed the Baby!" has nice color contrast pictures for baby vision and allows for interaction at the end as well as explication since you can add to the text with animal sounds and naming the animals.


The Librarian also had out as a check-out book "Brown Bear, Brown Bear What do You See." I got this in the Slide and Find version for a friend's 1 year old. Now I want a copy for my little one. Simple, repetative text which babies like since they are trying to take in the big wide world and it is comforting. Pictures with good color contrast. It names colors and has a surprise as well as allowing for you to adlibb based on the pictures easily.











I discovered this series at the bookstore. I want to get the whole series. It has lots of colors, textures, and things to touch. I also like that you can play around with the text and involve it with the environment. Maia has a little stuffed bunny and a stuffed monster that would go great with  these two books.  I got my friend's 1 year-old the "That's not my fairy" one.

Plant Postmortem

I got out in the backyard again today. Mostly, I cut vines off my golden lead-ball tree and big desert willow so the pepper-vine doesn't strangle it like it did my butterfly bush. I cut down a few dead plants. Started thinking about putting veggies into our 4x8 bed, since it is time for seed planting. I dug out some of the ollas in it so I can eventually turn the soil over. The oregano went nutty and is taking over half the bed. I also have to pull up all the weeds growing the bed to plant it. I'm thinking it will be mostly salad greens since I can't have brassicas since they give my baby gas. I'm not planning on watering even the ollas, so whatever grows, grows. I have lots of leftover seeds so I'm not too concerned.

I also dealt with our trash can of compost which I hadn't been taking care of it had almost years worth of decomposed bits which if I had a chemistry set would probably tell me all the nutrients are in the wrong proportion to actually be good on any plants. I've dumped the smelly stuff onto one of the tree composting piles. I've lost a few more plants that I planted the first year in the house, but the plants that are thriving are really thriving.  I pleased that quite a few of these perennials that are now dead at least lasted for 2 seasons of blooming before biting the dust.

My pineapple guava died, as did my butterfly bush, daleas,  hops bush, yellow-bells, non-native golden thryallis, wax myrtle, duranta erecta, flame acanthus, barbadoes cherry, pigeon berry, piquin pepper, american beauty berry, all the vines I bought except for the dragonsnap vines. It seemed like the coral honeysuckle was doing well for a long time but it also died recently. I won't be replacing any of these and I'm putting them down on my scorecard as not good in my yard are requiring too much care.

One the other hand, the rock roses (planted 4, 2 different kinds), climbing rose, alligator juniper, mountain laurel, dessert willows, golden lead-ball tree, common bluebeard, purple skullcap, mexican marigold and almost all of the sages are doing well. My monterrey oak in the front yard is also really thriving.

The gregg's mist flower is barely hanging in there as are the calylophus (which had been one of the most prolific bloomer up 'till recently), golden skeltoneye, damianita,  hymenoxys, native golden thryallis (the non-native died), spice bush.

For the most part more plants that I bought survived than died. I can't really afford to spend much on gardening this year and am realizing I spent way too much on plants last-year. I'm really glad I eventual moved to only buying the cheap 2in plants from the Barton Spring's nursery.  If I do get anymore plants I'm only buying ones that have already thrived in the backyard like the sages and rock rose, but I want to continue to monitor what worked and what didn't before purchasing any other plants. Especially since I'm thinking I may transplant quite a few in order to make room for creating a playground for Kiddo. I'm leaning toward a natural playground which incorporates play areas using natural elements like a sand box surrounded by rocks, boulders, tree stumps,  pathways made with wood or other natural elements...

I had planned on fruit trees, but now I'm thinking they require too much care...

After I get the backyard in a manageable cleaned up state, I will figure what needs to be moved and start making playground plans. I just need to remember that pea gravel and some other elements can be had free on craigslist.

Book Report: The Tao of Poop

One of my best friends sent me this book not that long after she spent almost two weeks at my house getting me through the hump of my husband going back to work. We had many conversations about how nothing went as planned for me and how difficult pregnancy, nursing and taking care of a newborn were and how unprepared for all of it I felt. I thought I would be spending my pregnancy getting comfortable with the changes in my body and doing art work and being quietly joyful about the coming baby. I wanted to enjoy my pregnancy just like I planned on enjoying being with my little one. Instead I threw up violently and ate for three and tried to stubbornly stick to all the plans I made in the first easy 8 weeks of pregnancy when life was so much easier. Through all the misery of throwing up daily sometimes every hour, I came eventually after it was all over to see it as a gift. It was great preparation at least physically for birth and surrender especially once I let go of all my birth plans and pregnancy expectations. But like any hard lesson I got to replay it with each new aspect of motherhood. I've had to surrender a lot and mourn my dreams/my delusions which all seemed so reasonable because I read tons of books, blogs, etc. What does this have to do with the Tao of Poop? The first chapter is about expectations and how they make you miserable... But it is not just expectations that make one miserable but comparison and judgement. My expectations didn't happen in a vacuum, I had a friend who gave birth 10 weeks before me, I had people constantly telling me about their experiences, I had a childbirth class or two not to mention book upon book, I had the legacy of the women in my families' births to lead me to a sense of failure as if there was some right way to do things. The Tao of Poop is about coming to terms with your expectations, letting go of self-judgement which also tends to translate into judgement of others and realizing there is no such person as the perfect mother. After each chapter where the author talks about her own trials she gives you exercises to do to reflect on your own life and example of other mothers coming to terms with motherhood. It is a super short book and I will admit I never do the exercises in any book just read and reflect. I had already come to the opinion that motherhood would be a spiritual journey for me after having to let go of my dreams of what I thought it would be like to coming to terms with what it is in the moment and this book helped remind me to let go.  It reminded me that everyone is different and there is no one right way. I'm planning on reading more memoir like books about motherhood, so I can retain a perspective of being in the moment listening to my child's needs and my own and so I can remember that there is no one right way.

Modifications to Cranberry Walnut Oatmeal Cookies (mother-in-law's recipe)

I cut down the sugar again to 1/4 cup which makes the cookies a little more crumbly. I think that is about as low as the sugar can go in a cookies recipe and still taste good. It also requires one to put less walnuts/cranberries and to press the cookie dough together to keep in one piece.

2 stick butter, left on the counter 'till soft

1/4 cup rapadura

2 eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 1/2 cups white flour (whole wheat pastry flour would work too)

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 rounded teaspoon cinnamon 

1/2 teaspoon salt 

3 cups rolled oats

1/2 cup dried cranberries

1/2 cup walnuts

Oven 350

Directions:

Beat together butter and sugars until creamy

Add eggs and vanilla; beat well

Add combined flour, baking soda, cinnamon and salt; mix well

Stir in oats and cranberries; mix well

Take a spoonful of dough and mash together a place on to an Ungreased cookie sheet

Bake in 350 oven, 10 minutes.

Cool 1 minute on cookie sheet.

Birth Mandala 1

This picture is a bit out of focus. I will try to take another one. This is the mandala I made for my friend C who wanted something that was 10cm to focus on for her birth. I started with contemplating 10cm by coloring 10cm circles which is the picture above with oil pastels. I'd never made Mandala's before this one. I used markers which is  generally not my best medium since it requires a little more precision than I am used to...

I'm really enjoying the markers now that I have used them a bit. I'm planning on making flashcards for my baby with neat art. I already made a black and white set with the ABC's and lines and dots which I show her just to stimulate her sense rather than for any true learning since she is way to young for the ABC's.  In all honesty, I do it because she gets so fascinated for a little while she forgets to be fussy.

Recipe: Gluten-Free Oatcakes Variation w/Almond Meal & Evoo

2 cups rolled oats

2 cups oat flour

3 cups Kefir

1/4 cup filtered water

3 tbsp Extra Virgin Olive Oil

4 tsp baking soda

2 tsp salt

4 tsp rapadura sugar

1 cup almond meal

Mix rolled oats, oat flour, kefir, & filtered water together. Let sit at least 7 hours (mine sat out covered for 16 hrs).

Mix in evoo, baking soda, almond meal, sugar & salt. Spoon onto greased cookie sheet. I used EVOO to grease and let it pool just a little so that my end oatcakes and crispy edges. 

Bake at 350 for 25 minutes or so depending on size of oatcakes. Makes 22-24 oatcakes. These have a tendency to spread so be aware as you decide spacing on your cookie sheets. I generally don't want to use more than 2 cookie sheets. These pretty much ended up touching other.

Very tasty with cheese. Quite biscuit-like in texture though flat. For variations add 1 tsp of spices like rosemary or oregano. Could also add cheddar pieces. This could also be a good sweet if you put more sugar, nuts, and dried fruit.

Keeps for 4 days in air tight container on counter. Best in Frig.

New favorite recipe. My husband even likes these quite a bit.

Thoughts on my Garden

I've been taking my kiddo on walks around the backyard in the morning. Looking around I'm reevaluating my garden plans that I implemented last year. It could be that being a mom is really changing how I think about things or just that I have a really finite amount of time available or it could be that all the ligustrum and other trash trees as well as the poison oak have grown back after all I did to eradicate them. I also have a bumper crop of weeds, grassy ones that have grown over everything even my raised beds. Part of me really wants a nice garden with beautiful plants that is really planned out and part of me wonders if we were meant to struggle with nature this way? Do I really want to play tug-of-war with these plants or can I find a way to live comfortably with them? I have a really limited amount of time in the backyard, so I have to maximize the time I do spend and really evaluate my family's needs. As much as I wanted a place and space for myself in the backyard and just to have something beautiful to admire at one time, now I look at it and wonder where is space for my kiddo to play back here?

I'm thinking now what do I want to save and what is not worth saving? What died after only a year? Granted it was a nice year, but still I was planning for long-term. Can I say that my garden experiment failed or should I say it succeeded beyond my expectations, but my wants/needs have changed.

Part of me wishes, now that I am out of time that I could just tell someone else what I want and say go at it, but then again the best part of gardening is losing myself in the work.

The Joy of Fabric Markers

I've had lots of fun with decorating white baby tees for my kiddo and friends. 

These are some onesies I made for my friend's little boy due in October and a couple of cool t-shirts that are a little more boyish/gender neutral.

Kiddo wore these briefly before she grew out of them.

Overgrown

Arg! 70% of the ligustrum grew back as well as the hackberry & china berry tree. I actually spent 30mins cutting down some of the growth along the fence. It felt good. I'm also proud that I didn't overdo it my first day back in the yard. I apparently made my yard so fertile that I will be spending quite a bit of time weeding this fall. Well, removal work is therapeutic.

I'm debating planting some of the seeds I saved from last fall. I can't eat brassicas because they give my newborn horrible gas pains, but there is a chance that by the time my brassicas mature that won't be a problem anymore. I'm not sure if I have time for the garden this year, it may take all my available time just to clean up the backyard so it looks happy again.

I lost a few plants. The yellow bells didn't last more than the first season. Found out that they are not freeze tolerant until established and my yard is way too open to the elements. I lost another of the first things I planted, the hops bush, died. Strange, since it has been a wet year. I haven't really taken an inventory of other things that have grown or I have lost since I don't make it out back too often. Parenting is tough work...

Recipe: Banana Cream Cheese Bars

• 6 tablespoons  butter, melted and cooled
• 1 1/2  cups  sugar
• 1/3 cup kefir 
• 3  large eggs
• 3 bananas mashed
• 1 3/4  cups  all-purpose flour
• 1/2  teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/2 teaspoon apple pie spice (allspice, nutmeg, cinnamon)
• 1  teaspoon  baking soda
• 1/2 rounded teaspoon  baking powder
• 1  package (8 oz.) cream cheese, at room temperature
• 1 tablespoon kefir or cream if using frozen cream cheese

Preparation

1. In a bowl, with an electric mixer on medium speed, beat butter and 1 1/2 cups sugar until smooth. Beat in 2 eggs, bananas, and 1/3 cup kefir until well blended, scraping down sides of bowl as needed. In another bowl, mix flour, cinnamon, baking soda, baking powder, and spices; stir or beat into butter mixture until well blended. Spread batter evenly in a buttered and floured 10- by 15-inch baking pan.

2. In a bowl, with an electric mixer on medium speed, beat cream cheese, remaining egg, 1 tablespoon kefir and remaining 1/4 cup sugar until smooth.

3. Drop cream cheese mixture in 24 evenly spaced 1-tablespoon portions over batter. Pull a knife tip through filling to swirl slightly into batter.

4. Bake in a 350° oven until center of banana batter (not cream cheese mixture) springs back when touched, about 30 minutes. Let cool completely in pan, then cut into 24 bars.

Recipe: Cranberry Walnut Oatmeal Cookies (Mother-in-Law's Recipe)

This oatmeal cookie recipe is one my mother-in-law adapted from a package of Quacker Oats.  I'm not sure how much she changed it.  I've changed it even more to cut down the sweetness since most cookies are too sweet for me.

2 stick butter, left on the counter 'till soft

1/4 cup evaporated cane juice

1/4 cup rapadura 

2 eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 1/2 cups white flour (whole wheat pastry flour would work too)

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 rounded teaspoon cinnamon 

1/2 teaspoon salt 

3 cups rolled oats

1 cup dried cranberries

3/4 cup walnuts

Oven 350

Directions:

Beat together butter and sugars until creamy

Add eggs and vanilla; beat well

Add combined flour, baking soda, cinnamon and salt; mix well

Stir in oats and cranberries; mix well

Drop by rounded tablespoonfuls onto Ungreased cookie sheet

Bake in 350 oven, 9 minutes.

Cool 1 minute on cookie sheet.

Recipe: Homemade Trail Mix Cookies

Crumbly, chewy, oaty, fruit nutty and seedtastic cookies. This recipe makes me understand why the Brits call them biscuits.

2 cups rolled oats
1 cup kefir
1/8 cup filtered water
1/4 cup raw pumpkin seeds
1/4 cup sunflower seeds
1/4 cup dried cranberries
1/8 cup dried blueberries
1/2 cup walnuts
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup rapadura
1/4 cup olive oil
1/8 cup coconut oil

Mix rolled oats, kefir, & filtered water together. Let sit at least 7 hours (mine sat out covered  with a cloth for 24 hrs).

Mix in oil, vanilla, baking soda, sugar & salt. After it is well mixed add dried fruit & nuts & seeds. Spoon onto greased cookie sheet and mash together with hands. (great for making your skin soft)

Bake at 350 for 20 minutes or so depending on size of cookies.


Somewhat crumbly, but very tasty with just the right amount of sweetness. Cut the fruit, seeds and nuts in half for less 
crumble issues. Store flat or they break apart.

As promised another version of my breastfeeding story

The Breast isn't Always Best.

Before I ever got pregnant, I knew I wanted to breast feed. The image of the baby at the breast was the ultimate image of motherhood for me which made being unable to breast feed hard. My large breasts in the beginning of trying to breast feed were so unwieldy, my nipples so large and shaped wrong, and I couldn’t seem to manage them. My child couldn’t seem to latch on most of the time and when she did, it hurt. Right from the first moment she was at my breast she tore up my left nipple. I was given a nipple shield to help with that, but it made it all the more harder as I fumbled with it. All of it added to my sense of incompetence at a part of motherhood that was suppose to be so natural and easy.

When the post-partum nurse tried to teach me to breast feed, my child turned red, screamed and fought being put on my breast. Breast feeding started to seem like an act of violence rather than the ultimate image of mother love. When my child turned blue at my breast and almost suffocated, I still didn’t give up even thought panic raced through my body every time she changed colors to red. When my child lost more than 10% of her body weight and we couldn’t wake her, I still thought breast feeding was best and going to happen, especially since my milk had come in and the post-partum nurse and I discovered that my nipples were fine, but that my child couldn’t suck my nipple the way she needed to to get milk. The nurse thought my kid had a tongue thrust issue and just required some training. 

Meanwhile until I could get breastfeeding going, we were going to spoon feed our kiddo with expressed breast milk so she could have the energy to try breast feeding. My kiddo wasn’t able to be spoon fed, she spit up all her food. After some consultation we eventually decided to use a bottle. My milk supply was starting to go down, though. My husband and I endured a night of screaming as we fed our child just enough so that she realized how hungry she was. Sometime during those hours of screaming, I had a moment of lucidity and knew I was sending my husband to the store for formula as soon as they opened. We just couldn’t go on like this... I was trying to follow the expert advice I was being given and going against my instincts that said my child needed to be fed and how it was done didn’t matter. At that point, she totally rejected my breasts by moving her head away or go completely still like an animal does when hit by headlights or she would scream when my nipples came near her. In two days, my child gained back most of her birth weight and her jaundice was mostly gone.

A week later, I tried again with the most experienced lactation consultant I could find. She noticed fairly quickly that my child had a breathing problem. Specifically, that Kiddo could not coordinate suck, swallow, breathe which apparently is suppose to be in a 1:1:1. I found out from her that babies naturally protect their airways which is probably why my child screamed at the breast and fought being latched on. The consultant was surprised we could bottle feed at all. The consultant gave me tips on how to feed with the bottle so that I could eventually try breast feeding if my child grew out of her coordination issue which often happened with kids around 3 months and also recommended taking my child to a pediatric ear, nose, throat specialist to make sure there were no hidden issues. 

The ENT knew immediately from the way our kid sounded that she had Laryngomalacia, which means that the cartilage in our little one's voice box is too soft and flops over partially blocking her airway.  After looking at our child’s throat she also diagnosed GERD because our kiddo’s throat tissue was very inflamed. Kiddo has what is known as "silent" GERD 'cause she doesn't spit up, but reswallows the acid reflux so that she gets a double dose which really inflames the tissue. The ENT felt that Kiddo's case was mild on both counts. She indicated that what we were already doing was enough with a few other modifications in how we fed her. Breastfeeding though was pretty much out of the question with Kiddo's trifecta of problems. After much research, I came to realize we were lucky that our child could drink breastmilk from the bottle at all. Our little one could easily have had failure to thrive and/or needed other medical intervention. Being able to take the bottle and being able to mostly feed her pumped breastmilk apparently was a success. I wish it felt that way. I try to feel grateful that with the bottle we know how much she is eating and that my husband gets to bond with our daughter through feeding her too. I'm also excited when we weigh her and see that she is growing,  Last weigh-in, she was 10lbs 10 ozs and not even 3 weeks yet. I think I will still be dealing with a broken heart for a while, but like all broken hearts, time will heal all I expect and I will get over the what-ifs and maybe I should haves...

Oral Defensiveness

I've just found another label for my breastfeeding experience. Finding labels like this are helpful because it says I'm not alone. I've found this website by MOBI Motherhood International that talks not only about low milk supply which isn't part of my issues at all but also about other reasons babies won't nurse.

I feel like through writing and editing my story to submit to a mothering website I've healed a lot. I rewrote my breastfeeding story 4 to 5 times, posted one to this blog (a very chaotic early version) and submitted one to the the mothering site I read the most (I will eventually post that one to this blog). Each new version of my story made me feel better, less sad, and less attached to my expectations as my writing became more organized I became less unhappy with my lot. Breastfeeding was about me and my image of what it meant to be a new mother. My child is thriving on my breast milk and she don't want no breast with it. More specifically her oral defensiveness has some real biological basis behind it. Breastfeeding means not being able to breathe to my baby and also being uncomfortable. Now that I've given up on her taking milk from the breast, I've been able to really get in touch with my baby's needs.

I'm finding other ways to soothe my baby, become attached, and feel like a mother.  My kiddo 'cause of her issues has a lot of gas and also because babies just have gas since their digestive systems are so new. I've learned some massage techniques and other techniques to help my baby through her painful gas bouts from my chiropractor.

The first technique is to put Kiddo face down across both my legs so that her tummy is hanging down between my legs and then to gently move my legs together and apart never squashing her tummy.  It is similar to the movement she makes when she arches her back, but in the opposite direction. My baby really likes this.

The 2nd technique is to massage her tummy. First find baby's rib cage then from below that in a reverse "C" (basically following the path of the intestine) starting at the top right, making light circling motions with two fingertips. The pressure on my own arm is just enough to tell my fingers are touching me i.e. barely press to the point one isn't pressing at all.

Another massage technique my chiropractor taught me for my baby who she has been adjusting starting a week after baby was born, is to make circling motions with two fingertips along either side of babies spine especially in spots that have tensions (are hard). Yet again the pressure is so gently that an adult would feel it just as a light touch on the skin.

It is nice to have tips to help soothe my baby. I can tell Kiddo really enjoys the massage techniques because she really relaxes into them.

I keep needing to remind myself especially since it is unconscious that motherhood is about my baby's needs not mine.  My image of what it means to be a good mother may not be what my baby needs. A good mother listens to her baby and learns. I'm getting there. Listening is hard especially since baby speaks a totally new language.

Recipe: Gluten-Free Oatcakes

4 cup rolled oats
1/2 cup oat flour
2 cups Kefir
1/4 cup filtered water
3 tbsp butter
3 tsp baking soda
2 tsp salt
4 tsp rapadura sugar

Mix rolled oats, oat flour, kefir, & filtered water together. Let sit at least 7 hours (mine sat out covered for 16 hrs).

Mix in butter, baking soda, sugar & salt. Spoon onto greased cookie sheet.

Bake at 350 for 25 minutes or so depending on size of cookies.

One of my favorite oat recipes plain eaten with cheddar. For variations add 1 tsp of spices like rosemary or oregano. Could also add diced cheddar pieces in batter. This could also be a good sweet if you put more sugar, nuts, and dried fruit.

Keeps for 4 days in air tight container on counter. Best in Frig.

Recipe: Cranberry Walnut Oatmeal Cookies

1 cup plain goat kefir 

1/2 cup firmly packed brown sugar 

1/2 cup rapadura

1/2 cup sucanat 

2 eggs 

1 tsp. vanilla

1 1/2 cups all purpose flour

1 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp cinnamon 

1/2 teaspoon salt 

3 cups Rolled Oats

1 tbsp water

1/2 cup walnuts (I love walnuts, so I probably put more than 1/2 cup)

1/2 cup cranberries

Heat oven to 350 degrees F
Beat together kefir, brown sugar, sucanat, rapadura until creamy.
Add eggs and vanilla; beat it up.
Add combined flour, baking soda, cinnamon and salt, mix it up.
Stir in oats and mix it up.
Drop by rounded tablespoons onto greased cookie sheet.
Bake for 12-15 minutes until golden brown
Cool on cookie sheet and place on wire rack.


Pretty tasty, but this first batch is too sweet for me though great with a piece of sharp cheddar. I think the next time I make these I will cut the sugar by half or maybe just leave out the packed brown sugar and add more walnuts.

recipe: Gluten-Free Potato Oat Biscuits

The first time I made this recipe, I used 2 cups goat milk kefir and 3 tbsp butter. My biscuits came out looking a little flat and more like soft scones or cookies, but were pretty tasty. I'm looking forward to eating them with some sliced gouda. I've made some updates to the proportions of this recipe with the hope that the dough will be less liquidy and will be trying to make it again in a few days. I suspect fluffier biscuits may require some more baking soda, not sure yet. I will have to fiddle around with all of it until I get everything just right.

• 3 Cups Organic Oat Flour
• 1 3/4 Cups Goat Milk Kefir (if you don't like a slight goaty taste use buttermilk or cow milk kefir)
• 1 ½ Teaspoons Unrefined Sea Salt (see sources)
• 2 Teaspoons Baking Soda
• 2 Tablespoons Organic Butter from Grassfed Cows 
• 1/2 cup mashed potatoes (these potatoes were literally just mashed, nothing in them but one could probably use mashed potatoes that have had the full treatment as well)

Instructions:

1. MIx 3 cups oat flour with 1 3/4 cups Kefir until the flour and milk are well blended. Let sit 7 hours or so covered.
2. Preheat your oven to 350 º F. 
3. Mix in the butter, 2 teaspoons baking soda, 1/2 cup mashed potatoes and 1 1/2 teaspoons salt in with your soaked flour, thoroughly.
4. Use a large spoon or 1/4 cup measuring cup to drop biscuits onto a greased cookie sheet.
5. Bake at 350 º F for about 20 to 25 mins (possibly 30 depending on your oven)

The Wacky World of Baby Sizes...

My child no longer fits in the 0-3 month side snap shirts. The sleeves are a little too short so her fingers are escaping and they are tight around her belly and she is only just over 3 weeks old. I was naive to think that age for sizes actually meant the baby's age especially when none of her newborn clothes fit her. My Kiddo was 8 lbs 12 oz and 21"  when she was born and the last time we weighed her she was 10lbs 11ozs. Sadly, they do not make fold-over long sleeve shirts for the over 3 months sizes which my little one desperately needs since she can easily get out of the mittens. I suspect by the time I figure out another way to make inescapable hand covers she will have grown enough to know that she is scratching herself up. In the last two or three days, we have been putting her in all kinds of clothes so we can get a snap shot of her in them since we doubt she will be able to wear them in a few days. I figure at least we can get a few hours use before she has completely grown out of them.

It be nice if baby clothes actually showed the weight and length rather than some random age that apparently means nothing. After some research on the internet and going through some baby clothes that do have the weight range here is some info on what those ages mean in term of size at least up until 6 months or so. Who knew that our kid would be wearing the 3-6 month size at 23 days of life in the outside world.

Age/Size	Weight	Length
Newborn	Up to 7 lbs, sometimes up to 8 or 9 lbs	Up to 17", but mostly not labeled
Up to 3 Months	7-12 lbs, mostly 7-10 lbs	17-23" or 19"-22"
3-6 Months	12-17 lbs, sometimes 10-14lbs	23-27" or 22"-24"
6-12 Months	17-22 lbs	27-29"
12-18 Months	22-27 lbs	29-31"
18-24 Months	27-30 lbs	31-33"

Carter Sizes (which seem to start out small from their website)

Size	Height (in)	Weight (lb)
Preemie (P)	Up to 17	Up to 5
Newborn (NB)	Up to 21.5	5 – 8
3M	21.5 - 24	8 - 12.5
6M	24 – 26.5	12.5 – 16.5
9M	26.5 – 28.5	16.5 – 20.5
12M	28.5 – 30.5	20.5 – 24.5
18M	30.5 – 32.5	24.5 – 27.5
24M	32.5 – 34	27.5 – 30
36M	34.5 – 36	30.5 – 33
48M	36.5 – 39.5	33.5 - 37